What Do You Desire?

Are you in a committed relationship and find your interest waning or are you single and looking for a partner? Whether you are in a relationship or seeking a romantic partner, clarifying what you desire can help you discover what you want in a relationship. While it’s easy to think you might want someone with certain physical characteristics, attraction is not the only element of a relationship.

Don't cheat yourself out of the full potential of this exercise. It’s best to go deeper than superficial qualities and examine the character traits and personality characteristics that will help you feel secure and loved within your relationship.

If you’re floundering to find your way to love and romance, think about the following areas of a relationship and explore what you want and what you have to help determine your chance of lasting happiness.

Affection

How do you show love? Do you show affection with near constant physical touches and embraces or do you prefer to keep your hands to yourself and show your affection through words or deeds? Being aware of your style of affection is important. If you and your partner can’t navigate differing affection styles, you may feel insulted, confused or alone within your relationship.

Values

Take time to examine your values. Do you place greater emphasis on adventure and experience or building a strong foundation at home? It’s important that you and your partner share values, or at least how to compromise. Many times values are inherent to someone’s personality and can be difficult to change, so it pays to make sure you share, or respect, the values that each bring to the table.

Mindset

Are you an optimist, pessimist or a realist? So much about your mindset shapes the way you react to events in your life. Do you need someone to balance you out? Be sure that you and your partner have compatible mindsets to help you weather many of life’s storms together.

Respect

Do you respect your partner? Does your partner respect you? Without mutual respect, your relationship is in danger of falling into unhealthy patterns. It’s vital for your emotional health that you can recognize and acknowledge the ways that your partner shows respect.

Expectations

What are your expectations for how someone will treat you? Can your partner meet those expectations or will growing resentment and dissatisfaction plague your relationship? While it can be healthy to have high expectations for how your partner treats you, you also need to look at how you meet the expectations of your lover. Make sure you are up to the challenge!

Many people have a long wish list of physical traits and personality characteristics that they hope to find in a partner, but overlook critical elements to a fruitful and lasting relationship. If your goal is to build a foundation for a fulfilling partnership, go deeper to determine if your partner will satisfy your desires and, and if you can satisfy your partner.